Happy new year to ye all. The turkey is gone -McKelvey the horse went also as did my new year resolution which shall not be printed.
Once upon a time this man arrived at bookies in Dundalk with the last of his savings and he placed them on this horse. He went outside and got up into a tree. Half an hour later this friend came out and says" Paddy you can come down--the horse won "--After Mckelvey i felt like getting into the Christmas tree--enough said about horses.
Midnight mass was at 11.30. Try and explain that to a Kerry man. Before I attended there was a bit of Par Up A Bum Bum before and after Midnight Mass( the afters is private) I visited the new pub in Cavan town "The Smith and Weston" Wilson). The jovial Senator was present and. said he might need a "Smith and Weston" to get the punters in and another to get them out.Councillor Paddy Sexton was present and before i left he was scoring goals with his heel and riding horses around Cheltenham. Senator Wilson is looking for a grant to install a skip at every new pub opened in 2006. In this way you can be recycled the next day. And talking of Senators The Bold Mary O Rourke is back with a bang. Her new hit single goes like this Black is black I want my seat back. Grey is grey since Donnie took it away Ho Ho. She has some battle on her hands. I reckon she should come down the Shannon in reverse and make a wish at the Shannon Pot.
Good old Aonghus O Snodaigh got in on the act about Mary,s sensitive words. This man should be listened to as some of his party workers were trailing the streets of the capital in vans working just as hard as poor Mary,s What is going on at all at all.Have you heard the Pat Short hit The Big Breakfast Roll 3 rashers 3eggs 3sausages 3black puddings---Reminds me of a farmer working in the locality. One hot day he got thirsty and went to the neighbours house for a mug of water. The neighbour was at the top of the table tucking into a big fry3 eggs 3 rashers 3 sausages --And the sweat hopping of him. At this time of year dont attempt to make any New Year resolutions .Wait for Ash Wednesday and the new moon. In times past the housewife was making plans for the coming year > She would not keep as many turkeys as last year. She was disgusted with the foul buyer and the treatment she received---Very thin Mam-- Four with crooked breasts shouted the buyer. It was not worthwhile anymore. But alas come April she was off to get the turkey "tramped again" ..Plans were set afoot. The cardboard box was got from the grocer . A hole was cut in the side of the box to let the turkeys head out. Hairy Ned twine tied the box to the carrier of the bicycle . She donned the coat and head scarf and off she went.
Mrs. Gaffney otherwise known as Ciss kept the stud turkey . Come out here Rumpold (The turkeys name) and do your duty. Sometimes Rumpold operated a five day week and the process had to be repeated. Neighbours sometimes didn't avail of the services of Rumpold for different reasons. One such man who had no legs but travelled the roads in his horse and cart stopped a young lad on his bicycle" Hoy young Brady has your granma a man turkey te year. Imagine the modern house wife going off in her 4/4 Jeep today looking for the man turkey .
Getting back to Ciss reminds me of carnival time in Redhills. Ciss boarded the carnival bus and husband Benny followed up on his bicycle. Figure that one out. Benny availed of some porter in the village and proceeded to the carnival to dance Ciss to an old time waltz . Neighbours the Murphy brothers were always positioned at the corner and when the saw the couple coming shouted aloud "Lock hard Benny " ---"-Eh right round Ciss"
Money was far from plentiful in those days. A coach builder was going from Belturbet to Cavan one day and he stopped to talk to John Eddie at Annagh Lake. As he departed he exclaims " If you had a Bull a Buck Or a Boar you will always have a shilling on the dresser -Not to mention a Man Turkey.
Signing off now for January.
Heard a joke about a man who years ago went to the late Fr A B Mc Grath with a very bad confession. For your penance go up to the Imperial and stand out side. There is a taxi man there and wait until he invites you in for a drink. What is going on at all at all?
Once upon a time this man arrived at bookies in Dundalk with the last of his savings and he placed them on this horse. He went outside and got up into a tree. Half an hour later this friend came out and says" Paddy you can come down--the horse won "--After Mckelvey i felt like getting into the Christmas tree--enough said about horses.
Midnight mass was at 11.30. Try and explain that to a Kerry man. Before I attended there was a bit of Par Up A Bum Bum before and after Midnight Mass( the afters is private) I visited the new pub in Cavan town "The Smith and Weston" Wilson). The jovial Senator was present and. said he might need a "Smith and Weston" to get the punters in and another to get them out.Councillor Paddy Sexton was present and before i left he was scoring goals with his heel and riding horses around Cheltenham. Senator Wilson is looking for a grant to install a skip at every new pub opened in 2006. In this way you can be recycled the next day. And talking of Senators The Bold Mary O Rourke is back with a bang. Her new hit single goes like this Black is black I want my seat back. Grey is grey since Donnie took it away Ho Ho. She has some battle on her hands. I reckon she should come down the Shannon in reverse and make a wish at the Shannon Pot.
Good old Aonghus O Snodaigh got in on the act about Mary,s sensitive words. This man should be listened to as some of his party workers were trailing the streets of the capital in vans working just as hard as poor Mary,s What is going on at all at all.Have you heard the Pat Short hit The Big Breakfast Roll 3 rashers 3eggs 3sausages 3black puddings---Reminds me of a farmer working in the locality. One hot day he got thirsty and went to the neighbours house for a mug of water. The neighbour was at the top of the table tucking into a big fry3 eggs 3 rashers 3 sausages --And the sweat hopping of him. At this time of year dont attempt to make any New Year resolutions .Wait for Ash Wednesday and the new moon. In times past the housewife was making plans for the coming year > She would not keep as many turkeys as last year. She was disgusted with the foul buyer and the treatment she received---Very thin Mam-- Four with crooked breasts shouted the buyer. It was not worthwhile anymore. But alas come April she was off to get the turkey "tramped again" ..Plans were set afoot. The cardboard box was got from the grocer . A hole was cut in the side of the box to let the turkeys head out. Hairy Ned twine tied the box to the carrier of the bicycle . She donned the coat and head scarf and off she went.
Mrs. Gaffney otherwise known as Ciss kept the stud turkey . Come out here Rumpold (The turkeys name) and do your duty. Sometimes Rumpold operated a five day week and the process had to be repeated. Neighbours sometimes didn't avail of the services of Rumpold for different reasons. One such man who had no legs but travelled the roads in his horse and cart stopped a young lad on his bicycle" Hoy young Brady has your granma a man turkey te year. Imagine the modern house wife going off in her 4/4 Jeep today looking for the man turkey .
Getting back to Ciss reminds me of carnival time in Redhills. Ciss boarded the carnival bus and husband Benny followed up on his bicycle. Figure that one out. Benny availed of some porter in the village and proceeded to the carnival to dance Ciss to an old time waltz . Neighbours the Murphy brothers were always positioned at the corner and when the saw the couple coming shouted aloud "Lock hard Benny " ---"-Eh right round Ciss"
Money was far from plentiful in those days. A coach builder was going from Belturbet to Cavan one day and he stopped to talk to John Eddie at Annagh Lake. As he departed he exclaims " If you had a Bull a Buck Or a Boar you will always have a shilling on the dresser -Not to mention a Man Turkey.
Signing off now for January.
Heard a joke about a man who years ago went to the late Fr A B Mc Grath with a very bad confession. For your penance go up to the Imperial and stand out side. There is a taxi man there and wait until he invites you in for a drink. What is going on at all at all?
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